Tell Them

Over the course of 20+ years in ministry, I’ve done a lot of memorial services. Each one is a unique and special tribute to someone’s life. However, there are always two emotions that occur without fail. The first, of course, is sadness. Losing a loved one is emotionally overwhelming... the feeling of loss and loneliness is punishing to the heart and difficult to bear.

The other emotion... the one that I see often (almost as much as sadness)

Regret.

The stinging heartbreak that comes when a person realizes that they are no longer able to make it right. I hear things like.. “I wish I had one more day with him.” or “I hope she knew how much she was loved” or even... “If I could just tell them one more thing...”

Why is that? Why do we feel that way at funerals? Why don’t the people we meet everyday know how we feel about them?

It’s easy really. Because we think they already know.

I heard a story once about a husband who was being yelled at by his wife. Everyday she nagged him and pestered him with the same statement, “Why don’t you tell me you love me anymore?” After several weeks of this, the man simply couldn’t take it anymore. After his wife finished her daily tirade, he slowly turned to her and said, “You want to know why I don’t tell you I love you? Because when me got married, I told you then. If that ever changes... I’ll let you know.”

Why don’t we say it more? Do your friends know you care about and love them? How about your spouse? Has there ever been a mentor in your life? Brother or sister?

If they were gone tomorrow.... would they know how you feel about them?

Life is way too short to go around assuming people know how we feel. Look at today’s verses...

“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:34-35

“Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Matthew 22:36-39

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

Jesus Christ didn’t wait to tell us He loved us... in fact, He climbed on a cross so there would be no doubt... He was crucified to eliminate any wonder... We never have to guess God’s intent or doubt His feelings.

Jesus is passionate about us

In the verses, He tells us to express our love for each other in a similar way. Sacrificially...wholly...without reservation, embarrassment, shame, or condition.

Love those God has placed in our lives... and remind them of that love regularly. Who is it in your life that you haven’t expressed your feelings towards in a while?

Is it your friend who has never left your side while you lay in the pit?

Is it a spouse who stood by your bedside while doctors treated you?

Is it a mentor who never made you feel like you were bothering them with the 500th question?

Is it your child...who is still trying to figure out the world, their emotions, and your rules all at the same time?

Is it someone who has hurt you in your family. The pain runs deep. They seek underserved forgiveness and you’ve met them with silent stares.

Who needs you to tell them you love them today?

I found this anonymous quote: “Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: Saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wish you had?”

Mistakes are fixable but regret is forever. Don’t wait. Make today the day you tell those special people in your life how you feel about them. Love them, encourage them, and remind them that no matter how deep the hole, how dark the valley, or how challenging the storm... you will be there for them.

Because they matter to God.

Because they matter they matter to you.

and you love them.

Staying in Touch

How many times do you touch your phone in a day?  Maybe you just tapped the Facebook icon to read this… or to unlock it.  Perhaps you swiped the screen to answer a call, send a snapchat, or make a photo bigger or smaller…  In any case, you probably make contact with the smooth glass screen more often than you realize.  A research study was conducted that found that users average between 2,617 and 5,427 touches in a DAY!  Hard to believe.  When confronted with the data, the people in the study were initially shocked… only to admit that even though the numbers were high it wouldn’t change the amount they used their device.  

But here’s the question… how many touches with God do we have in a day?  How often do we stop and think, pray, sing to, or interact with Him?  My guess is far fewer.  Scripture tells us that we need to be in constant contact…

"Come near to God and he will come near to you." (James 4:8)

“Never stop praying.” (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

Church on the weekend should reinforce the relationship that you spend building all week long through daily consistent interactions with God.  It’s not meant to be the only source of spiritual contact.  Find yourself in a tricky situation at work?  Pray.  Need encouragement and guidance?  Turn to your Bible.  Feeling melancholy or weak?  Write down some scripture that reminds you that you are far stronger than you realize.   It is through intentional touches with God that we are able to have joy in the storms and hope when things seem to crumble around us.  

So today, rather than reaching for your phone every time it beckons… spend some time in the Word.  Hear your text message tone ringing?  See that as a call to prayer.  Feel your pocket vibrate with an alert?  Use that as an opportunity to thank God for what He’s doing in your life.  Keeping up with the world is important… but staying in touch with the One who created you for greatness is even more so!

Simple Words

It has been said that famed children’s author, Dr. Seuss, loved challenges.  In 1959, the co-founder of his publishing company bet him that he couldn’t write an actual book... with a good story... using 50 words or less.  The result?  The beloved book, “Green Eggs and Ham”  To date, it has sold over 200 million copies... using only 49 words in its entirety.  It was an actual story... but told simply for easy comprehension.    

This got me to thinking about the way Jesus communicated with people when He walked the earth.  Easy to understand messages... object lessons... relatable illustrations... all meant to be simply stated but life changing.  If we want to impact the world with the life-saving news of the Gospel, we must stay focused on keeping it understandable...    The world is searching for hope... let’s commit to not overcomplicating what Jesus meant to be easily grasped... Commit to Christ... Love God... Love others... Serve... Give... Be blessed.  Just a few words...but they make an eternal impact.